It takes an old hand

Mom, you don't need to send toilet paper for Christmas, I've learned how to use the teapot. After some weeks of carying toilet paper around with me everywhere and some days of spilling water on myself and seeking the precise aim for such things, I've got it down... down there. So not to be too overly descriptive, all I can is this: If you pour the water down the small of your back and then use your left hand (that's why we only eat with our right) to clean-clean, you'll forever do a better job than toilet paper. Second, for the front, if you lean back a bit and pour the water directly down you can get a very direct stream that cleans good (hand usage not necessary). This method works so well I'm not even sure what we use toilet paper for anymore, and I've stopped instinctively reaching for it every time I sit down on the "throne."